Humanists Offer Cash for Rapture Victims

Live Last Days in Comfort

                              

The Center for Inquiry-West is making an unprecedented offer to their fundamentalist fellow citizens: Live out your last days in cash-rich comfort before the Rapture hits.

   

    “We’ve been hearing about the coming Rapture for years now, so we decided to earmark thousands of dollars for the purchase of cars, boats, houses and other valuable assets,” said Center for Inquiry-West Executive Director James Underdown. “ We will pay 10¢ on-the-dollar for people’s (soon-to-be) meaningless earthly possessions -- to anyone who truly believes the rapture is at hand.”

 

CFI says it will streamline the sales process for those who think they have no time to waste and take possession of properties a year or two into the future. By that time, the rapture will have passed, and earthly goods will be of no use to the sellers who will have ascended to Heaven  by then.

    The Centers for Inquiry are an Amherst, NY-based, international organization of rationalists who feel the recent paranoia surrounding an imminent rapture is not founded in reason. The best-selling Left Behind series of books have planted unfounded, modern, end-of-the-world notions in millions of believers. Belief in similar notions have been linked to the White House.

  “All we’re saying is ‘Put your money where your mouth is’”, Underdown added. “If you think this is really going to happen, we can help.”

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To inquire about a deferred-possession sale of hard assets, call James Underdown at (323) 666-9797 ext 101.